What Makes Laser-Focused Coaching Transformative and Long-Lasting for Clients?
* An article written by Marion Franklin, MS, BCC, MCC, Master Certified Coach
We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change. — Henry Cloud
Transformation only happens at a root level. If the coaching remains at the surface, any action steps are known as transactional. No thinking has changed — just an immediate solution. Yet, when the same or similar situation arises in the future, the client will need coaching on the same thing all over again.
Realistically, coaching should reach a deeper level that transforms the thinking and perspective. Once this happens, the client is equipped to handle any future similar situations by themselves. In laser coaching, going for the root cause of the problem (what is making it a problem for this person?) leads to the potential for a permanent change in thinking.
Client: “I want to become a director, but it isn’t happening.” Example of surface level: “What do you think is in the way?” (immediately accepting this as fact) Deeper level: “What’s important to you about becoming a director?” (finding out whether this is a ‘should’ or possibly something that doesn’t align with their truth. Or we can explore and find out that in the client’s mind, directors have huge responsibilities and are less hands-on (their favorite part of managing). Also, asking for the experience the client wants to have instead of how he thinks it has to manifest. “What makes becoming a director important to you?”)
As opposed to focusing on results, the intention is on purposeful exploration leading organically to long-term transformation that affects all areas of a client’s life. The client naturally creates their own forward movement from a highly motivated perspective. From the literal first question, more profound, insightful coaching is underway.
You might not realize you’re assuming something, yet when you accept exactly what your client says as truth, you’re assuming that it isn’t perception when it might be just that. Problems occur when you accept untested assumptions as truth — either your own or your client’s. Example: “My boss hates me.” This may or may not be true. We might discover that ‘my boss hates me’ is the client’s perception when in fact he is rude, nasty, and snippy with everyone.
Laser-Focused Coaching relies on understanding the person, not their situation or problem. A major distinction is that the coach doesn’t automatically accept the client’s words as the truth, because most of what we hear is likely that person’s perception of what is true. Learning how to distinguish truth from perception is the foundation of Laser-Focused Coaching.
In taking a transformational approach to coaching, questions arise in the moment based on what you hear. Yet as simple as such natural questions are, they can (and often do) have the most profound impact. You are responding to what your client presents instead of making them respond to what you present. The bottom line is that you have to stay open, neutral, above the details, and objective, or you’ll likely get caught up in their story and miss what’s essential for their transformation.
There are at least six methods to facilitate a shift in thinking. The most common is direct communication followed by a question. However, that, along with removing the obstacle, challenge questions, picking up discrepancies, far-fetched analogies, and most often finding and debunking the leverage point all work toward creating a new viewpoint.
Transformational shifts are new viewpoints that transform thinking going forward. When your client shifts their perspective or viewpoint, new opportunities and solutions present themselves, which, in turn, create immediate long-term change. Additionally, the client is organically self-motivated to move forward from their new vantage point.
